Hi everyone. Normally, I try not to air my problems online, one because I'm an eternal optimist, and because I want to keep my posts here doll-related in some way. But something recently upset me, and it is doll-related, so I thought it would be ok to write about it here.

My sister, the only one I have, is several years older than me, and is the first born out of the four of us. She has had to go through some health and personal problems in the past, but she is smart, determined, and is now very successful in her chosen career. Unfortunately, my sister can also be insensitive to the feelings of others, especially my own.

When my sister and I are alone, she is fine, but as soon as anyone she knows arrives, she starts making fun of me and contradicting everything I say. She has even gone so far as to make fun of my appearance. I love my sister, and as much as her behavior hurts me, I try to be a better person and let it roll off my back. In the past, when I felt that she was going too far, I would wait until we were alone to tell her how I felt. But each time, she has either acted triumphant, or as if I am over-reacting. I've tried to figure out just why she does this. Maybe she has low self-confidence and tries to make herself look better by putting me down. I don't know for sure.

As much as it hurts, I can deal with my sister insulting me. But yesterday, she made fun of my friends.

At the last NY Dolpa (NY Dolpa 2), which was my very first, I brought my sister with me because I didn't want to be alone, and because she is much more well-traveled then I am. I had the time of my life, and my sister seemed to be enjoying herself too. She even held someone's doll, and for a moment I thought I had converted her! Since everything went so well last time, I've arranged for her to come with me to this year's NY Dolpa as well. Everything seemed fine, until yesterday.

Me, my sister, and her fiancee (who is very nice), went to stay with my grandmother for the weekend. As I had feared, she began to make fun of me and contradict everything I said. I had brought my dolls with me so I could take pictures of them. I was telling my grandmother how excited I was about going to the NY Dolpa, when my sister began laughing. She then began to make fun of many of the people we met at the last Dolpa, even going so far as to imitate them. I was shocked. My sister had never said anything negative about them before, and here she was, making fun of some of the wonderful people I know, true friends and fellow Volks-fanatics. I'm not going to name names, because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I confronted my sister immediately, but once again she acted both superior and as if I were being immature.

Now I'm worried. She was fine at the last Dolpa, but what if she begins to act like that at this Dolpa? I have no one else to go with me, and I have already spent a lot of money so she could come. I'm so afraid that my sister will act horribly, and that people will hate me by association. My mother understands my fears, but she thinks that my sister will be fine during the event. I pray to God that she's right.

I just can't believe that my own sister would make fun of my friends, and the very same people that she seemed to like so much a year ago....

The last few days have been so green and warm and beautiful that I can hardly believe that just last month we were knee-deep in snow! ^_^ It feels as if it has gone from winter to summer in two days!! Everything is growing and budding, the birds have been singing... I even saw a male and female cardinal yesterday!!! *w* We put out our hummingbird feeders, so hopefully we'll see lots of little hummers this year! <3

We finally finished raking, so at dusk I went out to take even more pictures of my yard. ^_^ I'm beginning to think that my kitty knows what I'm doing when I take pictures, because he keeps following me around and striking adorable poses. :D When I was almost done he climbed partway up our old elm tree and hung there looking at me with his big eyes. It was so cute!!! ^0^ But before I could adjust my camera, he jumped down. -_- I was a little annoyed, but I can't stay mad at him for long. <3


Besides taking pictures of my yard, I've been trying to get ready for the NY Dolpa. ^_^ It's getting closer and closer and I can hardly wait!!! *0* This time I'll be bringing my own camera, so I'll be able to take as many pictures as I want! I'll also be staying both days, since I absolutely must try to get my little Megu!!! <3

So that means - Admission Fee, Guest Admission Fee, hotel room for two days, transportation, food, FCS MSD F-18 Girl, possible One-Off, YoSD Megu, any little extras + a possible trip to the Sanrio store = me being poor for a long time. @.@ But it will be so worth it!!! ^_^

Raking, raking, raking... Raking, raking, raking... Raking, raking, raking... RAW HANDS!!! :P

LOL, sorry for the lame parody, but my family and I have been doing yard work for the last two days and my poor hands are so rough and sore! -_- Ouch! *0* I have some really nice, rose-scented hand cream my grandmother once gave me, so I'll survive! ^_^ But we've only finished HALF of our yard!!! @.@ Oh dear... O.o

But the good thing is that I was able to cut a lot of dead wood off of the lilac bush, so it should be a lot healthier now! ^_^ I can't wait until it blossoms!! ^0^ The scent of lilac is one of the most wonderful scents on earth! <3

I went out and took a few more pictures of my yard. It still looks a bit messy, but it's a lot better then it was! ^_^

Yay! I finally took more pictures of my beautiful Claudia!!! They aren't perfect, but I think I'm getting better! I hope you enjoy them!

Hi everyone! ^_^ I'll try to update my journal more often, so you don't have to read my outdated news. ^_^;

My grandmother's funeral was very nice, and I think she would have liked it. I never knew she had so many friends! I'm so glad that so many people loved her. Whenever I feel sad, I just think about my grandmother in a beautiful, happy place with my grandfather and other loved ones. The thought of her being happy in heaven makes me happy too, so I feel much better. ^_^

Roses have always been my favorite flower, but recently I've discovered the most beautiful roses I've ever seen! <3 They are David Austin's English Roses. It's so easy to forget that roses come in all different shapes, and these gorgeous flowers have simply enchanted me! :D I wish I had a beautiful English garden full of gorgeous, fragrant roses. White, red, pink, yellow, peach... I want to just kiss them all and make them bloom! Being surrounded by beautiful flowers makes me feel like a princess, and I dream and pray that one day I will have my very own rose garden. ^-^

Yay! The NYC Dolpa finally has a website!!! ^0^ I'm so glad! It isn't complete yet, but it's still so exciting! I keep praying that someday Volks will open a Tenshi No Sumika in New York City. Wouldn't that be wonderful? <3

Since I didn't win Rose, I now have lots of money for the Dolpa! I'd love to order another FCS, but I'm having such a hard time making up my mind! @_@ I would love a white SD F-08 Girl with Rose's makeup, or a gothic SD F-01 Girl, or a sweet SD F-14 Girl! Or maybe I could order my very first Mini Super Dollfie! MSD F-18 is so adorable! <3

I hope the One-Offs are beautiful! I would love an Elsie, Nagisa, Sweet Dream Nana, Momoko, Sweet Dream Mimi, Kurumi, Luna, or Sweet Dream Nono One-Off! Especially if they were painted by Ciera! I already have my beautiful Sweet Dream Nono, Virginie, but if I saw a Sweet Dream Nono One-Off with white skin and makeup by Ciera, I don't think I could resist! Virginie would have a sister named Eugenie! ^_^

I hope that Mrs. Shigeta and Ciera are there! <3 I would love to meet them! And I wonder what the Limited Doll will be like! Will I finally win my own beautiful Sei/Rei Tenshi?? Oh, I can't wait!!! ^0^

With much excitement,

Cammy ^_^

Hi everyone! Can you believe how long it's taken me to update this thing? Sorry about that. I just keep forgetting that I have a journal!

Doll-wise, everything is pretty good! 

About a week before the Kyoto Dolpa 5 dolls were announced, I dreamed about a gorgeous SD Girl with long pink hair. She was so beautiful, and you can imagine how disappointed I was to find out it was all a dream! I wanted so badly for her to be real... Then I saw Rose, and it was like my dream had come true!!! I never knew I could save up enough money so fast, but I did, and I joyfully entered the VolksUSA Lottery for her. Unfortunately, I lost her. But, being an optimist, I know that there will be other gorgeous dolls in the future! And I still have my two beautiful girls! And now I have lots of money for the NYC Dolpa!

Now comes my sad news.

My paternal grandmother passed away today after a long illness. She had lived a long ninety-four years, and her death was peaceful and painless.

I remember when I was younger and had my very own American Girl doll, which really did look just like me. Before her sight worsened, my grandmother was a talented seamstress, and she offered to make me some clothes for my new doll. All she had to do was make a few tracings on a paper bag, and a few weeks later she presented me with some of the most gorgeous and detailed doll dresses I have ever seen. It was like magic. How could an old woman who shook from palsy make such beautiful clothes?

About a year ago, my grandmother started to give some of her jewelery away. It made me sad when she gave some to me, because I think she sensed that her end was near. Along with this jewelry, she also gave me the very first ring my grandfather had ever given her. It is far to small to fit on any of my fingers, but it is the sentiment that matters to me. I will keep it forever.

When my grandmother was in the hospital, I brought my dolls, Claudia and Virginie, to cheer her up. I was afraid that she wouldn't like them, but to my surprise, she loved them! I wish I had taken pictures of her holding my girls. I want to remember her like that always.

I love you Grandma. You may be away from us now, but this isn't really goodbye. It's just "see you later". When my time comes, I know we'll meet again.

Cammy

Merry Christmas, everyone!!! ^0^ It seems like it came especially fast this year! ^-^

I hope everyone has had a great holiday so far! My family has given me such wonderful gifts. Here are my favorites:

Manga Bible: That's right! It's a Bible with manga-style illustrations!!! ^0^ most of it is a regular Bible, but there are sections of manga-style comics illustrating some of the most important moments in the Bible. It is really awesome and I highly recommend it!

Gothy Double-Doll Carrier: Yay!!! Now I can carry my girls around with me in style! ^_~ They fit perfectly inside, and you would never guess that two Super Dollfie in it!

The Third Season of Murder, She Wrote: Yes! I admit it! I like to watch Murder, She Wrote. ^_^; I know I'm supposed to be too young to like it, but I do. LOL, I'm amazed that my brother thought of it!

Not only that, but tonight my family and I are going to have one of those Friendly's Ice Cream Rolls for dessert!! Mmmm, yummy!! *w*

Have a wonderful holiday everyone!!! May all your dreams for the New Year come true!! <3

Cammy ^_^

Hi everyone!!! ^0^ A while ago it was the birthday of Kimber Rose's Azure, and after she had sent Claudia such a wonderful welcoming present, I wanted to do something nice for his special day. ^_^ Unfortunately it took me weeks to get to it (schoolwork... -_-) but I finally finished it!! ^o^

Check it out!!

Kimber Rose really liked it. I'm so glad! <3

I also made another Christmas photostory!! I hope you like it! ^-^

Dolpa 18 is going to kill me! ToT First those gorgeous h.NAOTO outfits, then this!! Isn't it so disturbingly cute??? *w* Whoever would have thought that an ancient, evil, elder god could be so sweet? <3

(Can you tell I'm in love with the automatic linking feature? ^_~ )

Have a great day everyone!!! <3 <3 <3

Cammy  ^_^v